the sound of her voice kept ringing through my head like a song that always repeats itself "I love you Ashley i always have and i always will no matter what happens" that was the last thing she ever said to me before she got into the her moms car and they left moving back to Ohio and that was 2 years ago the day she moved was March 10th 2008. we were juniors in high school when we first met and we were best friends ever since that day and that friendship turned into more between us we swore to eachother that we wanted to be togehter for the rest of our lives but after she moved something happened and we drifted apart.i mean sure we texted back and forth for a few months and all but then we stopped texting we even stopped trying to keep contact. Spencer\'s mom never liked me and she is the main reson why she stoped texting me i know that is the reason even though aiden calls me crazy i know thats why. I still am madly in love with that girl and i would do anything and everyhting to get her back in my life
People alwyas told me after she left that we were never meant to be together and that i had to get over her sometime so i just started dating again to make people think that i am over her when really i am in no way ever gonna get over her. me and aiden are actually dating right now he knows that i still have feelings for her but he does not know that i still love her he thinks i love him even though i have never actually told him that i do. i did sleep with him once and after he left that night all i did was cry myself to sleep because it was not spencer that i got to sleep with and then have her fall asleep in my arms. i always knew she would be my future wife and deep down inside i know we are gonna meet again someday and get married call me crazy but i know thats it is going to happen.
We even knew what we were gonna name our kids when we had them. we were gonna name the girl Amanda Marie Davies and we were gonna name the boy Matthew Rryan Davies. i have always loved the name amanda and she says she always wanted to have a son and name him Matthew, Matt for short. i still have my times when i watch videos of us when we were toghether. ya ya i know why be so upset that this girl is gone?? but she is my sould mate i love her with all my heart and soul.
I was rummiging through my closet this morning looking for a video game that aiden had left here and i found it and when i turned around looking at the case i had got hit in the head with a bag of old vieo tapes that had fallen off the shelf of my closet and when i picked it up i ralized it was one of the many bags of tapes from when me and spencer were together and i decided to watch one so i just randomly took one of the tapes and put it in my camra and watched the tape and it was one when me and spencer were just spending some alone time together at my house when nobody else was here.
i was watching all these old videos laughing and crying remembering old times and then i came to the video when i first told spencer that i was in love with her all i could do was smile at that video. that was also the first time we ever made love to one anoter. that was the most amazing night of my life and i know it was for her to because she told me it was.
okay so here i am 19 years old and with a guy i don\'t even love well i do love him but only as a friend i am going to break up with him because i just can\'t keep living this lie i have got to get a hold of spencer and at least tell her i still feel the same way i did when we were in high school.
Kyla. Ashley Ashley Ashley
Ashley, what Ky?
Kyla. guess who is comeing back
Ashley, Casper?
Kyla, no spencer is comeing back
this is is this is going to be my chance to beable to see her and tell her i am still in love with her
Ashley, you can go out now kyla
She left and i just about jumped out of my pants i was so excited she was comeing back. no matter what i was gonna get my girl back. i was gonna get MY SPENCER back no matter what it takes to do it.
My heart will ALWAYS AND FOREVER BELONG TO SPENCER CARLIN
