All thought died away at seeing those blue eyes. Beautiful, familiar, warm, and loving- they were in shock, examining every inch of her from head to toe. They met her brown, pinning them down with an intensity that pierced through the fog of ecstasy. The brunette felt her, her fears and concerns. The way her lips parted before quickly closing again. The blonde stood speechless and didn't know what to think of the girl standing before her wearing clothes that left little to the imagination. Most of her abdomen revealed, brutal words hidden along with a bruise that took hours to properly cover, one she vowed Spencer would never see. Standing outside on the door step, like an open book, she saw all of Spencer's concerns. Always concerned...why? Ashley didn't understand why she always wore such a painful expression whenever she was around. The brunette found herself wishing she were like everyone else. Someone oblivious to her inner turmoil, someone who didn't give a fuck! Tears burned behind her eyes and she wasn't sure why. Crying wasn't what she had in mind showing up. The plan was to sleep with Spencer and leave. A booty call, that's what this was about.
Spencer just wanted to cum.
Acting impulsively, face expressionless, hiding what was numbing all over again. There was no guilt or arousal as she pressed her body into the blonde's. Closing her eyes, she was briefly aware of the warm breath tickling her skin followed by the feel of soft lips pressed against hers. With one hand she cupped her face, deepening the kiss, teasing her tongue, and with the other she cupped her breast kneading it through her clothing. She was going to make Spencer feel better than the fucker in the bathroom! Her girlfriend was going to cum and cum and cum and cum- The blonde turned away from the kiss and gently pushed her back. “What are you doing?”
The question took her off guard and she stared strangely into the blonde's eyes wondering why they weren't darkened with desire or why she didn't give her a hungry stare like the stranger in the restroom. Didn't she love her petite body? “I-I...” Her lips sealed shut and she looked down. “Isn't this what you want?”
The question was asked dejectedly, her voice quiet and tired as she stared at the floor. She wasn't good enough to sleep with Spencer. The blonde must have finally realized how filthy she was, smelled the guy on her, tasted him on her breath- she wanted to cry, curl up in a ball and close her eyes, never opening them again. The ecstasy did little to make her feel good. Did nothing to clean how dirty she felt.
“Don't you want me?” She murmured more to herself than to Spencer, losing herself in her thoughts, disappearing from the room. A soft touch to the face and she flinched stumbling back into the door. Her hand moved covering the hidden bruise on her side, the dull pain taking her back to the bathroom stall. His hands gripped her too tightly there as she awkwardly rode him on the toilet seat. She was thankful for the condom he wore without any complaints. He must have thought she was full of STDs by the way he quickly slipped it on. Not that it mattered, he ate her out and her body betrayed her by liking it, giving him more and more...
Ashley slid down the door until she was seated on the floor, staring blankly at the same spot on the carpet. She could still feel his hands on her, remember every flick of his tongue, the smell of the alcohol on his breath- why didn't she hit the tree? He would be there forever in her mind and she would see his face whenever she fell asleep and wake up tormented by it- She should have hit the tree and erased him forever from her mind.
A warm body settled next to hers on the floor and she flinched a second time feeling an arm brush against her. She didn't want to sleep with anymore men.
