She laughs and shakes her head, “What do I need a date for?”

“Because sometimes what we do gets in the way of love. Don’t you agree?”

“Love? What’s that?” she asks with a smile.

“The kind of love I’m talking about?”

“Yeah.”

“The feelings…the feelings that can exist between two people—romantically.”

“I don’t know if I even believe in that anymore.”

I just look at her.

“Besides, I don’t have time.”

“Not having time for love is one of the worst things I’ve ever heard,” I say, sounding high-pitched and slightly immature and hating every second of it.

“You don’t understand, Spencer. The love I want right now…these feelings that exist between two people that you talk about? I want that. But I want it with my daughter. Not romantically.”

“There’s room for both I think.”

“Not right now. Not for me. I mean, of course, you know? Of course I miss being held by someone who actually cares about me or having someone spend the night without leaving a check on my dresser. But I wouldn’t even know where to start looking. Don’t even get me started on trying to find someone who actually accepts what I do. Not even accept, really. Just someone who understands that I’m not just some…I don’t know.”

“No, no. I know what you mean.”

“Maybe someone like Aiden would understand,” I say, gently nudging her towards the truth despite my better judgment.

She looks at me strangely, “What are you talking about?”

“Well, he’s a guy who knows what the business is like. And he’s pretty attractive and…”

“Where the fuck is this coming from?” she asks, standing up.

“Whoa, calm down. I’m just saying…”

“I am calm.”

“I know you’re sleeping with him,” I blurt out, hopelessly.

God, I hope someone gets me self-control for Christmas this year.

“What?”

“I’ve seen him leaving your room…I’ve seen you kissing and…”

“You don’t know what the fuck you’re talking about.”

“Fine,” I say, holding my hands up innocently, “maybe I don’t.”

“No, you don’t!”

“Ok!” I yell back. Because I know what I saw, and she could deny it all she wanted but she wasn’t going to make me feel like I a crazy person.

“I can’t believe I fell for this shit about wanting to be my friend.”

“I do want to be your friend. This doesn’t change that at all.”

“Are you kidding me? Are you fucking kidding me, Spencer?”