So I was watching the Liam Show (I like shoes, Text message breakup, and No Booty Calls, etc, so yea) while writing this so it’s a little random LOL Anyways yea. Sorry about last chapter I didn’t really proof my writing, so my bad.

Ch 5: I can get Sexual too

Oh man this is going to be an interesting night.  

“So where do you want to go?” She asked. Well I wouldn’t mind going back to my room, losing the clothes and doing the nasty. But can I really say that, sadly no…

“Well are you hungry?” I smirk. I know I am!

“Yea, starved.” She says and winks. Was she flirting? Oh god I think I just died and went to heaven!?

“This is a sick ride Miss. Davies.” I grinned and hopped in the Porsche.

“It was a little ‘I’m sorry for being absent in your life’ present.” She smiled despite the anguish in her voice.

“Well I guess then we share something in common.” I laughed.

She shuffled through song and I paused as I recognized the song playing.

“Hey leave it.” I told her.

“If I die and go to hell real soon,
it will appear to me as this room.
And for eternity I'd lay in bed
in my boxers, half stoned,
with the pillow under my head.”

I smiled and she nodded

“This is probably one of the funniest songs I’ve heard! I’m surprised you have this song.” I turn it up and immediately my head starts to bob to the beat.

“I'd be chatting on the interweb;
maggots pray upon the living dead.
I had no interest in the things she said.
On the phone every day,
I'll permanently hit the hay.”

And there I go, I tune everything around me out, and start belting the song. I forgot a crucial aspect of myself, I can’t sing!

“I called her on the phone and she touched herself.
She touched herself. She touched herself.
I called her on the phone and she touched herself.
I laughed myself to sleep.

At this rate,
I'll be heading for electric chairs.
I'm only human with my cross to bear.
When she described her underwear
I forgot all the rules my rabbi taught me in the old schul.”

All of sudden I hear a low chuckle and just like that I’m brought back to reality. Oh shit, oh shit this is not happening!? Why to be smooth dumbass, you’re trying to impress her, remember!

“Damn Carlin, you can be the next American idol.” She snickered. Yep get the gun, load the bullets and shoot me now!